Sex and the City ... without the Sex

It was a cool saturday night, two month after Ameeyn said "Hello" to Udy's (little) friend, who turned out to be from Botswana, and "The Guys" decided to go to the club and shake some stress off.

At 10:30pm, Ameeyn, KayZ and Udy were all seated in Mubi's car, a silver Gen-2, waiting for him to come and drive them off to the club. Ten minutes, and nearly a hundred complains later from Udy, Mubi came, and they were on their way.

"Am not really into this club thing...", came Ameeyn, who only came because everybody was going. "I just came cuz I didn't wanna stay home alone"

"Kai dai fadi gaskiya...",came Mubi, "We all know you going because Zubaida is"

"Haba Da Allah, everyone knows nothing is happening between us", Ameeyn said in defence.

"Kar ka raina mana wayo mana, you definitely have a thing for her", said Mubi again, taking his eyes off the road to look at Udy, who was beside him in the passengers seat, as if expecting an approval.

Udy on the other hand said, "Come on, give the guy a break. Or are you jealous?"

"Jealous? Jealous ma ass!", said Mubi, looking serious. "Don't you know that I met her and got close to her before he did. If I'd wanted her, I would have gotten her."

"Mubi this doesn't call for violence", came Kay-Z who had been silent the whole time. Everyone laughed, because he was imitating Udy's voice. "Mun yarda"

"Whatever dai, I just want him know that if I'd wanted her, I would have gotten her. He aign't better than me"

"Hey, Hey, Hey, stop talking about me in third person as if am invisible or something", said Ameeyn, who was starting to get pissed with the conversation. "And please, stop acting like a jerk, mun ji baka son ta, mun gane ". All the guys laughed, and Mubi felt defeated. So he was planning to get back at Ameeyn.

Five minutes later, they were at Sunshine, a club they frequent, but they were not alone. Half the Nigerian folks in Melaka were all there, with the exception of Zubaida, who for some reason, didn't show up as she promised. This was the perfect audience Mubi needed to get back at Ameeyn. So he put on a mischievous smile, turned to get the attention of the entire "ears and mouths" of "Nigerians in Melaka" and said it. Everyone, including the bouncers of the club was laughing, with the exception of Ameeyn, who knew he was fucked, because with the people present there, writing the story in the papers or announcing it over the radio won't get as much audience as the people there would.

He went and sat down on a bench overlooking the beach and started thinking deeply. What Mubi said had an element of truth in it, He told himself. Don't lie to yourself Ameeyn, his other part said, its all true. But am too smart to be that guy, he further thought. That's what Zeminsky said before he was dumped, another part of him said. Who the hell is Zeminsky? He asked himself. Then he realized, he had no idea, he just made it up.

Meanwhile, inside the club, Khalil was drunk and having a fight with one of the Bouncers, and Udy and Kay-Z were trying to get him out of the club before anyone got hurt, or worse, got shot. Hopefully, No one got shot.

**********

The guys were back home and all in the sitting room. KayZ was seated on the two seater with Asma'u attending to his broken lips from the fight in the club. Udy was on the three seater with Catie, the girl he introduced Ameeyn to two months back, and she was caressing his Cigar branded arm, also from the club fight. With their two butts on the three seater, it looked more like a one and a half seater... well, mostly because of her's. Ameeyn on the other hand was seated on the one seater, with no one to tender his shattered image and totally bruised ego. Probably because I didn't get it from the club fight, he thought.

"Why are you so quite today?", Asma'u asked Ameeyn, who knew him to be quite a sweet talker.

"He had a lil feud with Mubi", came Udy, even before Ameeyn opened his mouth.

"What happened?", She asked, whether out of concerned, or an ear for gossip, it wasn't quite clear.

"Mubi said that Ameeyn and Zubaida's relationship is like...", started KayZ, and then he looked at Udy. A mischievous smile crossed both their faces, like the one Mubi had in the club. "Skipper and Miranda's from the first season on Sex and the City - without the sex"

Say Hello To My (Little) Friend...

Long before Kazma'u's photo shoot, or Abaida's reluctant dance; even before any of the members of C - G - 5 set foot in C - G - 5, something came to PPB. Well people actually. People 150 in number... The Botswana.

**********

It was a normal night. The guys of A - 1 - 1 were all in the sitting room watching TV and just having a chain of small talk. Just then, Mu'azzam came in. He was smiling, and had a look on his face. The guys saw it, and knew immediately what it meant: Mu'azzam had got some news.
Ameeyn looked at him, mirrored his smile, and said "OK... Update us". This might sound mean, or rude, considering it was the first and only thing he said to Mu'azzam, but when it comes to Mu'azzam and his news, or "update" as he liked to call it, you can call him a bastard, call his dad an alcoholic, his mom a whore, even tell him to go fuck himself, and he'd still update you, after which he might get into a fight with you, depending on what you called him initially. Mu'azzam always tells his news the moment he gets it, doesn't matter to whom. As the story goes, there was a time he updated someone, not knowing he was in fact talking to the guy in his update.
"Did you guys see the Botswana that came?", Mu'azzam said as he found a seat and put his butt down, probably for the first in the day. "They are over 500!"

"WHOA! WHOA! Mu'azzam relax..." said Mubi, "...I heard they're just 150"

"Well even 150 is huge...", replied Mu'azzam, sounding disappointed because he was not the first person to update the guys."...And do you know that the majority of them are girls?", picking up his enthusiasm again, this time hoping he would actually succeed in updating.

"The ladies aren't even pretty", came Mubi again, "And I heard 'yan kauye ne ma"

"Well I saw some guys earlier today...", started Ameeyn "...they looked annoyingly overdressed. Didn't see any ladies though"

"Yeah... the guys are feeling like they are in America or something, wai su sun zo yankee", Udy said, for the first time. "I'll definitely not get along with those kinda guys"

"You know what, I would never go out with any of the girls", said Mubi, looking really serious.

"Why is that?",Ameeyn asked, totally cluesless.

"How can I go out with a Bakauyiya... I'd have to teach her everything, and she'd disgrace me in public, I can't leave with that you know", he came.

"You don't even know them, why the sudden prejudice?", Ameeyn came in defense again.

"Ameeyn whats your problem? If you wanna go out with them, then go ahead... babu wanda zai hana ka", it was Udy coming in Mubi's defense, which was very logical because at that time they were best of pals.

"No. No. No. I didn't say I was gonna... Am just saying...", and he stopped there. That was what Ameeyn always said when he had no point in an argument. "So you're not dating them too?", he was looking at Udy this time.

"NEVER... sai kace wawa"

"And you Kay Z?"

"You know me, if she's not tight, then she's not mine", they all laughed at Kay-Z's statement. It was the first time he said anything since Mu'azzam came, and he said it in his style. Maybe that was why they called him Kay-Z, because of his flows like the rapper Jay - Z, who happened to be his favorite.

They spent the rest of the night talking about future plans and ambitions, non of which contained any Motswana.

**********

10 months later, seated in front of Block C was Kay-Z, looking at a balcony in block D full of girls . A few metres away by the gate, was Mubi in a car admiring every girl that passed, wishing... Well, just wishing. Even closer, inside a room in block A, Udy was sitting on his bed, with a pretty girl beside him. At that moment, Ameeyn came into the room. Udy beemed at him with excitement, the kind Mu'azzam carried 10 months ago, and said,

"Ameeyn, say Hello to my (little) friend"

... The Girls were all Botswana!

Welcome To C - 1 - 6 ... Let the Magic Whisk You Away

Obi hustled all week, gathering money for his send-off party. Normally, his friends were suppose to be the ones to organize the party. So now that the guy is hustling for Ringitts to make his own party, you'd know immediately that there's a problem somewhere.
Later that night, his hustling paid off. There was loud music, drinks and beer for everyone: All the ingredients for a normal party. People started coming around midnight, and before long, the whole of C-1-6 was booming with all sorts of people, mostly Nigerians, Botswana, and a few of his other international friends. The party started, and before long, everybody was dancing and having fun.
Somewhere in the crowd, seated between two drunk guys, was a light skinned guy. He seemed shy, and totally uncomfortable. He was not tall, and not bad looking either. He was casually dressed in a T-shirt and jeans, and was thinking of the best way to get the hell out of the party. Meet Ameeyn.
Not too far away from Ameeyn, was a guy dressed for anything but a party. He was a little older than Ameeyn, and definitely not bad looking either. At that moment, he was complaining on how much the DJ sucked. There was a flash, and he turned and gave the person that just took his picture a piss-me-off-and-i'll-kick-your-ass kind of look. Meet Udy.
Outside the apartment, seated near the sidewalk was another guy. His dressing was neat, and at first glance, you could tell that he's either an only child or the youngest in his family. He still had something that looked like baby-fat on his face, and some girls find that adorable, or cute to say the least. He was alone at that moment, and a lot was going through his mind. Meet Kay-Z.
The party was half way through when Ameeyn finally decided to leave. Just as he was making his way through the crowd, a hand caught him.
"Hey Ameeyn, was looking all over for you. Care for a dance?", said a girl with looks somewhere between cute and super hot. She had a smile. A really nice one. She was tall, for a girl, and had a nice body. Ameeyn had met her once or twice before then, her name was Zubaida.
"Err... OK.", he replied, not wanting to blow her away, but being fully aware that he'd take the "Worst-dance" Award home that night should he dare step on the dance floor.
Just then, a guy full with energy came in. His physique was somewhere between slim and chubby, and he was dressed so casual you'd think he just came back from a stroll in his garden. He was smiling, and he's one of those guys that you think can never get mad at anything. Meet Mubi. He was the guy Zubaida has been with since she came to Malaysia almost a month before, and as it is in any community, gossip was flying around that they were in fact dating.
Mubi pulled Zubaida away, and Ameeyn couldn't go out anymore because of the promise he made Zubaida; atleast that's what he told himself. But deep down, he didn't leave because he might be feeling something for her.
Minutes later, Zubaida came back, took Ameeyn's hand and led him to the dance floor. All that was going through his head was how much of a wuss he was to be led around by her like that. Less that a minute into the dance, there was a flash, like the one with Udy. And that was Ameeyn's first photo with Zubaida.
As the three guys left C -1 - 6, and made their way back to their place, Kay-Z and Udy had Ameeyn on the spot. They kept teasing him of how much he liked Zubaida, and how perfect they would be. At that time, all that was going on in his head was how not-to-screw-up with her... nothing else mattered.

In front of block A, was a car, two guys and a girl. One of the guys was new, so was the girl. The other guy was to say the least, the Nigerian mascot, at least to the Arabs. The other guy was tall and reasonably huge. He carried himself with importance and was sympathetic to all that he deemed lower than him, which in his case, was almost everyone. The girl looked shy. She was what Hollywood would call chubby, but other people knew as full figured. She had the most innocent look, and as the saying goes, if its too good to be true, then it probably is. Meet El-Sox, Sani and Asma'u!

At 4am, the guys locked the door to A - 1 -1, their apartment, and said goodnight to one another. Ameeyn went to bed, not knowing what the future held for him and Zubaida.

**********

Roughly 6 months later, at a party, there was another flash on the dance floor at C - 1 - 6. Only this time, it wasn't Ameeyn and Zubaida. It was Kay-Z and Asma'u's first picture...

... Welcome to C - 1 -6, let the magic whisk you Away...

The Pangsapurians: Dedication

I dedicate this work...
... to Ahmed, for constantly teasing UDY and making his life a hell...
... to UDY, for his hobby of making fun of KAY-Z...
... to KAY-Z, for thinking less and being happy for a change...
... to "The House of Basori", and all its people, for being OUR number 1 hangout...
... to Husna, Yacine, Yana & Binta, for being part of OUR lives...
... to Mubi, for being the housemate WE never had...
... to Muri, and members of his Masion, for the friendship WE shared...
... to Gajibo, for the pleasure of being mistaken for ME...
... to all the internationals in all the Pangsapuris across Malaysia ...
and finally to Jidda, for showing ME this side of life, experienced by few!

Thank you everyone, and hope you enjoy my work.